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| The long-awaited opening credits roll... |
Blame the BBC for overwriting old tapes, if you like. But after what seems an age, the long-lost footage of the second episode of the Doctor Who adventure "The Apetopus Experiment" has at last come to light - yes, we finally got round to playing another episode - in January 2022. Yes, it's taken that long to remaster the footage for this blog. If you missed it, the first episode, which aired back in January 1999, is available here.
THE APETOPUS EXPERIMENT
Episode 2
A burst of flame appears through the front window of the Jeep, as the mouth of the Apetopus opens with an ear-piercing, alien shriek. Inside the Jeep, the Doctor and the Brigadier hold their hands over their ears in pain. The camera zooms in until Jo's screaming face is all that can be seen.
The Jeep has crashed, and the Land Rover pulls up beside it. As the Apetopus somehow squeezes into the back, the Corporal is seen briefly checking over the bodies in the crashed Jeep, as if looking for something, and then he and the possessed bystander pull Jo Grant's unconscious body into the Jeep, and they all drive off.
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The Doctor opens one eye, then the other, finding himself in a bed inside a white room. A nurse leans towards him, raising a stethoscope, about to check his heartbeat. Aware of her likely reaction should she discover his second heartbeat, he abruptly rises, apparently fully recovered.
"No need for that, nurse", the Doctor announces, "Time is of the essence. Where is the Brigadier?"
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The corporal, driving the Land Rover, emerges from a wooded track onto a country road. Jo Grant, unconscious, sits next to him in the passenger seat. He turns suddenly, knocking a policeman off his bicycle into a ditch in a comedy moment. "Bless my soul" The policeman remarks. The Land Rover hurriedly drives on, the policeman following as fast as possible on his bicycle, and the camera pans to a roadsign pointing along the road: LITTLE SODDINGHAM 2 MILES.
On the outskirst of the village, the Land Rover has stopped beside the pub, where some locals sup their pints, pointing and laughing as the corporal examines a punctured front tyre. Their amusement changes as they see the alien, and they are immeditately possessed, and handed weapons from the back of the Land Rover. The sounds of a bicycle bell and "Ere I want a word with you!" become gradually louder as the possessed bumpkins advance, and open fire.
A breathless and dishevelled policeman drops his bicycle and rushes into a phone box. "Get the Chief Inspector on the line now, this is an emergency!"
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| UNIT troops approach the village |
As his men disembark the Jeep, Brigadier Lethbridge-Stewart and the Doctor, squeezed into the back of the police car, continue listening to DI MacGuffin.
"That's correct", the Tough Detective states with some alarm. "The local Constable followed the stolen Land Rover, only to be attacked by some raving mad villagers with army weapons who seemed to be possessed!"
"No need to panic, Detective Inspector," the Brigadier continues calmly. "We deal with this sort of thing all the time. You can rely on UNIT to take out that alien creature before it causes any more damage."
"I accept that it wanted the Apetopus", the Doctor muses, "But why take Jo? I fear there's a lot more to this whole business than we understand."
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| All seems safe, though strangely silent |
Ahead, the village appears quiet. An abandoned Land Rover, its front tyre obviously punctured, is parked at the roadside ahead.
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| Alien forces lurk in ambush |
But all is not as it seems. Possessed villagers, armed with military weapons, take cover behind buildings and stone walls ready to ambush any who approach. Behind them, their alien commander watches while the Apetopus lurks menacingly amongst the vegetables in someone's back garden.
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| "Right then lads, let's arrest these troublemakers" |
The police car passes the Jeep and pulls in at the road verge. Spotting some movement in a patch of scrub in a field nearby, the Brigadier orders two of his men to investigate while the others check out the field opposite.
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| "All clear. Advance!" |
"Don't worry, Detective Inspector," the Doctor reassures, as UNIT soldiers cross the fence and scour ahead for enemies. "The Brigadier really does deal with this sort of thing all the time."
But before MacGuffin can reply, the sound of gunfire intrudes from somewhere behind.
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| What can possibly go wrong? |
The shot, which has come from the scrubby area, misses, and UNIT troops close in on the possessed villager, their intent to subdue rather than kill. Two trained soldiers against one possessed bysyander? What can possibly go wrong?
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| A cautious advance |
Assuring everyone that his men have the situation behind them completely under control, the Brigadier encourages the others to advance across the fields into the village. MacGuffin and this men lead the way, the Doctor following behind.
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| What (more) could possibly go wrong? |
Somehow, the possessed bystander escapes the soldiers, and shoots one of them. Obviously just a minor setback, no need to worry. The fight continues.
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| This looks like the perfect place for an ambush |
The main party approaches the village, which is eerily silent. Keeping their heads down, they expect the inevitable ambush.
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| What possibly could have gone wrong did |
The possessed villager breaks off a second time, and again shoots, this time killing the wounded UNIT trooper, who didn't even get a chance to stand up. With signs of other armed villagers approaching from the distance, the remaining soldier makes the sensible decision to run back toward the vehicles to comparative safety.
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| "Keep your eyes open, they're here somewhere!" |
Our heroes warily advance, knowing the enemy is nearby.
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| Safe... at last! |
The trooper returns fire from the cover of the Jeep. Someone has left the keys in the ignition.
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| "Mmmmf! Mmmmf!!" |
Tied and held by two possessed villagers, Jo Grant spots the Doctor and his companions and knows they are walking into an ambush. As she struggles to shout a warning, muffled by the gag across her mouth, she is ushered further away by her captors.
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| The soldier leading the way ignores the abnormal shape of his weapon |
Cautiously, our heroes cross the last fence and cautiously enter the village. The Doctor and the Brigadier exchange concerned glances.
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| "Grrrrr..." |
As they scout around the far side of the village, the men of UNIT come under fire. The Apetopus snarls, waiting for the right moment to attack.
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| "You're saying you brought a truncheon to a gun fight?" |
The ambush triggered, DI MacGuffin and his men come under attack. As MacGuffin returns fire, he orders the two unarmed constables to take cover against the building and close the distance to the troublemakers down.
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| "What did you expect?" |
But this is not a safe place for unarmed constables, and one of them falls in the incoming hail of gunfire. Ignoring a wound, MacGuffin returns fire as best he can, as the soldier who was left behind approaches in the Jeep.
The Doctor, still puzzled as to what is really going on in this episode, sagely watches on.
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| "Apetopus approaching, nine o'clock!" |
A glance to his right alerts him to the danger.
"Watch out!" The Doctor overdramatically shouts at MacGuffin, pointing towards the approaching Apetopus.
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| Where did all the others go? |
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| The devious plan begins to come to fruition |
The alien commander, who appears to be in charge, senses a need for protection as the enemy approach. Psychically commanding those around, it sends its minions in while retreating, mysteriously disappearing behind a nearby building, as if it has some sort of devious plan.
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| "I wondered where you were. Have you seen the Brigadier?" |
Possessed villagers form a line, exchanging fire with the UNIT troopers ahead, as the Apetopus appears undecided as to what to do next.
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| "Ere, I want a word with you!" |
Undeterred, MacGuffin and the remaining constable round the corner of the building and confront some of the villagers.
"Put your guns down, lads," MacGuffin shouts. "You're under arrest!"
The policeman beats one of the villagers to the ground with his truncheon.
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| The Apetopus slinks away |
The Apetopus, under the villagers' covering fire, surprises everyone by moving toward safety as fast as it can instead of attacking. The Doctor reacts fast.
"Stop that Cephaloprimate!" he shouts. But the only man who can hear him is the trooper driving the Jeep.
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| "Ere, I want a word with you too" |
With one villager in handcuffs, the constable beats another one down with his truncheon and arrests him too.
MacGuffin attempts to stop the third before he makes a run for it.
"Come quietly, son," he reassures, "Or we might be forced to give you a kicking!"
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| CRASH! SQUELCH! |
The trooper stamps on the accelerator and the Jeep careers around the corner into the High Street, crashing into a squishy halt against the Apetopus...
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| Maybe that wasn't such a great idea |
...which smoothly turns, smothering the jeep with its tentacles.
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| "Ere, I want a... urgh!" |
The villagers behind arrested, Macguffin spots Jo Grant and her kidnappers in the distance, and races to rescue her. Suddenly, everyone hears a strange, alien sound (which anyone who has heard the TARDIS before will be familiar with). MacGuffin and the constable stop, astonished. What on earth? Unfortunately at this precise moment the constable accompanying him is cut down by an ambushing villager's gunfire as he appears from his hiding place.
"The TARDIS?" says the Doctor, as a disconcerting thought crosses his mind.
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| "So, we meet again, Doctor!" |
"Mwhahaha!" announces the smiling Master as he briefly waves from behind the corner of a building, from which he has mysteriously appeared. "You might think you have won, but you are much mistaken! Goodbye!"
He steps back behind the edge of the building and disappears from view as the TARDIS sound dissipates.
But the Doctor, though annoyed and confused by the Master's surprise appearance, has more important immediate priorities to attend to.
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| The Doctor saves Jo just before the episode ends... or does he? |
Somehow the Doctor has managed to close with Jo's captors faster than anyone else, and in a flurry of masterful fencing he downs one of the villagers, dispatching the second with an unconventional but imaginative application of his sonic screwdriver.
"Jo, it's alright, you're safe now," the Doctor says, untying the gag across her mouth. And then, backing off. "Oh no!"
Jo's body twitches artificially, and as she sits up it is clear that her skin is some sort of plastic. She stares at the camera, but her expression is wrong, a blank mask, and then, abruptly, her face falls away to reveal robotic, inhuman eyes amongst a tangle of android electronics, as the Dr Who theme suddenly bursts in and the end credits roll.
Until next time (which hopefully won't be in another three years)...
THE CASTS
UNIT
The Doctor (Unearthly Traveller, Star, 9)
DI Jock MacGuffin (Tough Detective, Star, 10)
Brigadier Lethbridge-Stewart (Dependable Deputy, Co-Star, 6)
4 x UNIT Privates (Army Private, Extra, 2 each = 8)
2 x Police Constables (Extras, 2 each = 4)
1 x Jeep (Vehicle, 4)
1 x Police Car (Vehicle, 4)
TOTAL 45 points
The Aliens
Alien Commander (Otherworldly Invader, Star, 10)
The Apetopus (Marauding Monster, Co-Star, 5)
The Possessed Corporal (Cultist Leader, Extra, 3)
Possessed country bumpkins (12 Cultists, 2 each = 24)
A Land Rover, abandoned at the side of the road (4)
(The Master is not included in the points count as he only appears right at the end)
TOTAL 46 points
